Refuse to be a Container of Pain

Humans are the only species that argue, complain, struggle and fight to make their lives miserable in the process.

Spiritual writer Eckhart Tolle asks:

Have you ever seen an unhappy flower or a stressed-out oak tree? Have you come across a depressed dolphin, a frog that has a problem with self-esteem, a cat that cannot relax, or a bird that carries hatred and resentment?

Then he tells the story of two ducks. They are floating along peacefully at ease with themselves, totally present and going with the flow. Occasionally, they will get into a fight — sometimes for no apparent reason, or one duck has strayed into another’s private space.

The fight usually lasts only for a few seconds, unlike America’s 21-year war in Afghanistan, which barely ended recently, or like the unprovoked, and unjustified war in Ukraine which is raging as I write. Or like a resentment you may have with someone that has been going on for months or even years.

I have met numerous humans in funeral settings who regret their estrangement from relatives for years.

Unlike us, the ducks separate, swim off in opposite directions, and flap their wings a few times. By flapping their wings, they are releasing energy, thus preventing it from becoming trapped in their body and turning into negativity. They are letting it go.

Feelings of anger and resentment negatively affect our body.

Eckhart Tolle calls it the “pain body” which is an accumulation of painful life experiences that were not fully faced, processed, and accepted when they happened. Pain body is not necessarily pain in the physical body, but the pain affecting the physical body due to mental pain.

Pain body includes grief and grievances from the past that were left unresolved and swept under the mental rug.

It can also include negative ideas, ideologies, and prejudices that harden our hearts and prevent us from really loving other people.

It creates negative energy around resentment, judgment, emotional restlessness, and mental pain.

Your pain body can affect, impact, and infect people around you.

Pain body produces a stress hormone called cortisol.

When cortisol is released into the bloodstream, it contaminates our heart and brain, and we feel uneasy. Every issue turns into a problem and every challenge becomes a struggle. We are a species that has lost its way.

Spiritual writer Joan Chittister says that the “human species is the only part of nature that has a monopoly on the seven deadly sins — pride, anger, lust, greed, sloth, gluttony, and envy; some distinction!”

(from Cosmic Kindergarten: Earthly Lessons for a Heavenly Life)